How to ruin with his own hands a child? All that should be avoided in the relationship with their children:
NOT EVER TALK OF FEELINGS IN FAMILY
neither of you nor of those of your children. Never put in words the emotions and feelings. The reference to emotions and feelings with children is nonsense and a waste of time. Not complied with the emotional life of your children. Pretend that the pain does not exist, that joy is not there, that fear does not exist, that concern does not exist, that anger does not exist, that sadness does not exist and so on. Do not waste too much time in thinking and discuss the emotional and relational problems in the family, nor in particular the emotional and relational problems of your children.
DATES IMPORTANT THINGS TO SOLID
Consider the fact that the most important things in life in the family and outside the family are material things. Money, career, clothing, fun are the most important things in life. Achieve wealth, power and social image are the goals and values to be transmitted to their children, especially through the example and witness daily. We are in a world where what matters is not what you are, but what you have is not important to the inner life, but the ability to appear, to show good to others.
ABSOLUTELY DO NOT MISS ANYTHING YOUR CHILDREN
games, money, facilities. Do not ask anything in return. Surrounded continually your children's attention materials. Remember that the best way for you to forgive your lack of communication and presence is to think of a nice gift for your children. Try to make your children's lives as easy as possible, because your life or your children in particular were suffering from crossed. Try to confronting them as little as possible to the needs of your children. Less and less frustrations limits are given to children, the more they will grow up happy and without complexes.
TRY TO PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN THE MOST 'POSSIBLE FROM HARDNESSES EXISTENCE. Avoid talking about topics that may or may awaken traumatising early impulses and tensions. They must be carefully avoided topics such as death, illness, disability, sexual desire, violence, sexual abuse, parental separation, war etc. Do everything to be postponed when your children will be confronted with these problems. The children can and should be an age happy away from ugliness, conflicts and problems that children can continue to ignore for years as long as they become larger and will have the strength to speak and understand these issues.
EDUCATE THE CHILDREN TO BE WINNING
The world's winners.
Reward achievements and initiatives that succeed. Discourage children in the communication of problems and difficulties. The failures should not be allowed in any way in terms of education. Giving space to communication problems and difficulties on the part of children is likely to encourage complaints and whining. Everyone must go it alone in dealing with problems with will power and pulling capacity, provided you have. The function of the family is not to give support to its members in difficulty.
NOT EVER TALK OF YOUR WEAKNESSESParents need to be perceived by children as perfect. Children need to feel that you are superior, must admire the pedestal on which you have been or still appear in their eyes. Both the weaknesses you may very well hide the children! Introduce more competent, efficient, able to control situations. Not admit any mistakes or weaknesses! If children perceive your sides more human and fragile, can break down all the educational goals. If by chance you are wrong, the worst thing you can do is apologize. They are the children who have to be brought into question, not you. Weaknesses and errors rather concern them, not you.
REMEMBER THAT ARE LODI
Unnecessary and counterproductive. Avoid especially the praise, there would be spontaneous and that might be realistic. Children do not have to get used to praise and valuations. If the children perform well their duties or they get positive results, perhaps with commitment and effort, this must be considered a foregone conclusion, a duty that must normally be made from them. Why should not expect an acknowledgment. Strengthen the self-esteem of children is risky. Keep low self-esteem is rather useful, because it stimulates them to get busy.
DO NOT BE AFRAID OF YOUR CHILDREN HUMILIATE When it takes a punishment, it takes. Do not worry that the punishment may present a character sadistic or humiliating, what matters is that the punishment has a reason. The end justifies any means to educate, as it may give suffering or accompanied by an attack humiliating image of your children. The slaps or corporal punishment can be very useful for teaching their children that they were wrong, although they may perhaps be very ill. Past the experienced injury or humiliation of the children they can easily return to the issue for which the punishment was given and eliminate any feelings of anger or rebellion.
KEEP THE POWER ON YOUR CHILDREN
Do not miss in a thousand threads wasteful and unnecessary in dialogues with your children. What matters is not so much to clarify precisely the problems that can arise, the duties and responsibilities of your children and your children situation to situation. Not been to explain your behavior with infinite patience. What matters is to convey a clear distinction of roles between parents and children, those in power in your home and who is not held, who should command and those who obey, who is right for the role that exercise and experience available and who is wrong.
TEACH YOUR CHILDREN TO BE AFRAID OF THE WORLD
Try to represent all that outside the family as something that can be dangerous. A healthy distrust helps to address the risks that await children when they come out from the reassuring family. Taught to have respect and obedience to parents, because only parents can find that affection, that guarantee and the confidence that they can not find elsewhere.
DO NOT FORGET THAT THE CHILDREN BELONG VI
The children are your children. You put them in the world and you will have the air we breathe, we owe their lives, you owe everything. Do not allow anyone to intervene in the way you treat your children, as you do not allow anyone to enter your home or take your stuff without permission. As mothers have kept them in the belly, as the fathers have guaranteed the maintenance. You have a right to expect something in return.
DO NOT WORRY TO INVOLVE YOUR CHILDREN IN CONFLICT Conjugal.
Try to bring out your point of view and your personality of father or mother should not favor at all costs the unity of the parental couple in front of their children. If your spouse is attacked fight back. Try to take your kids on your positions. What matters is that your rights and your image of the father or mother is not diminished and that it is also clear that the fault lies with the other parent!
ALWAYS DEMAND THE BEST FROM YOUR CHILDREN. POINT TO PERFECTION AND THAT 'AN IDEAL EDUCATIONAL DOPE.
Even if your children can not reach it, they can still get close to it. Try to be more demanding, and expect the best from your children. Do not be diverted by the needs of children are always used as an excuse to retreat from commitments. Do not be moved by the tears and by the compromises. The objectives are the ones who should be referred. Do not underline the positive aspects but negative ones to encourage them to improve. Do not trust the children and developed the ultimate surveillance on the lives of your children. May betray your expectations. Do not bet on communication, but on control.
DO NOT TAKE SERIOUSLY CHILDREN.
Stink even milk and presume to know how the world works. The kids are spoiled: for the most part are full of whims should be managed. Children are scarcely credible and live in a dream world. If children are weights seriously there is a risk that high-minded. Do not take children seriously especially when referring situations of discomfort or even violence. Let the subject drop and isolate them. Let them bask in their broth of lies.
DO NOT EVER THINK ABOUT YOUR CONSISTENCY.
Not that important to achieve consistency in educational attitudes. If you give a rule and the next day you do not comply, if threatened punishment in case of a possible disobedience of your children and then not keep it, when the disobedience hath been made, if you tell your children not to tell lies and you do not realize your lies, when stated a principle that yourself first trampled, preached good and evil razzolate, if you claim the respect of your children and yourself then not guaranteed, if you tell the children not to swear when you blaspheme, all this is not important. Are your children who must learn consistency, not you.
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