Often mothers describe their children as restless, lively, mischievous, Maneschi and obedient little short, mischievous kids unmanageable, reveals their feelings of helplessness and often inability to educate a child. Children misbehave always. The parents of today, however, declare increasingly disoriented and unable to face them.This "new" difficulty arises not from the kids but from the relationship that parents have toward authority. Today's parents tend to have a friendly attitude with their children, as much as possible equal. While in the past it was normal control children wand and punish their whims, today we risk falling into the opposite, to allow all, tolerate whims indefinitely, or to give endless explanations about why an order. It is important that a parent towards the child manifest their authority firmly.We can not say that a child is inherently unmanageable: sometimes need a little extra effort to help him change his attitude, with positive effects on both the serenity of the child and the family atmosphere.WHY 'THE KIDS DOING CAPRICCI?When children misbehave the only thing you want is them to stop. But why children misbehave?Because through them the child is always trying to say something to their parent, to throw a message.In some cases it is a way to draw attention, perhaps because he feels neglected.In many cases it is only sleep, fatigue or the arrival of the fever that makes children intolerant.In other cases it is a reaction to a system of prohibitions and rules that perceives excessive or confused.It may be his way of expressing the competition with a little brother, more 'big or most' small.It can be a way to express his discomfort to something that happens in the family.Even an alarm bell for something the child suffers kindergarten or school and which it considers responsible parents because we take him or that he can not say otherwise.It 'important to deal with serenity and firmness of your crying baby: try to figure out if she cries for a justified reason. If complains about pain, hunger, fear, respond immediately to the request; if he cries because he wants something, you can decide whether or not to oblige. But when does a tantrum, ignore it, do not give it to him at the time won the whims or plants; children often do tantrums to get your attention, to make you give in, to change your decisions, to be able to do what they want; cry to make you change your mind. Do not give in to this blackmail!TIPS TO MANAGE WHIMS OF CHILDRENTo manage the whims of children, it should first review what are the expectations with respect to how the child should behave and what is right to expect from him. Require, for example, that the child does mess while playing, that does not knock down the crumbs while eating, which immediately obey every order given, it is to have expectations that are sure to be disappointed bringing mothers to become themselves the source their frustration.Here are some tips to better manage the vagaries of small:THE RULESThe rules and that the rules are the best way to accompany the growth of a child.It 'important to identify some simple rules and expect them to be respected, without showing signs of slowing. No means NO! the "no" once said can not magically become a "yes" when you are in front of the whims, just to make sure that the smaller the stop. It is also important to be consistent with the given rules and keep clear what is allowed and what is prohibited. What is prohibited it can not be allowed depending on the mood or fatigue. It 'important to maintain a uniform attitude between mom and dad. E 'wrong that mom and dad give prohibits, or vice versa.ReproachesIt is not very useful scream or attack the child when they got crazy or does something deemed incorrect, because over time this attitude will lose value and effectiveness. And 'more useful, however, to communicate to the child with a calm tone that the behavior is not the correct one, and then suggest ways to improve, "as it certainly is able to do." E 'fundamental fact also send you our esteem for him and the possibility that he "can be really good."THE PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPIt is not wise to think of establishing a relationship with their children as equals. Put on the same level of a child is a terrible trap, which causes difficulties for small, because you ask them to be adults prematurely. A 2 or 3 years of dates and explanations do not talk about rules, but apply them without discussing them.Do not look for an equal relationship with the child until he is mature: if two years have not been talking about rules: the baby does not understand its meaning; apply them and that's it. In 4-5 years you can start talking about discipline the child, however, avoided to establish the rules with him, because he lacks the necessary judgment. From the age of 14-16 years a teenager can discuss discipline with parents and together will establish rules and punishments. The more you show you parents Democrats in the early years, the more you risk to spoil your child. Typically small can not manage the rules, are you as parents have to instead establish them and enforce them.WAITINGAnd 'necessary to teach the child to wait. Wait your baby needs to accept the frustration better, to learn to be patient. The wait will not damage the psychological growth of the child, rather serves to strengthen it.One way to help the child to tolerate frustration can be to get used occasionally to look for alternatives with respect to what they would like, for example. "You can not eat dessert before dinner, but after dinner."THERE IL CAPRICCIO "hysterical"Sometimes the whims degenerate and the child begins to scream, to kick and threw himself on the ground like crazy. Especially when this takes place in public places, the parent is in crisis, fearing more than anything else the judgment of those around him.Add your cries to her or maybe to yank "to reason" is completely counterproductive. The best tactic here is to try to ignore it completely alone until understand that with his attitude will not get the desired result and will stop. If you can ignore seek to contain it with a firm attitude, without fretting, bringing in a more quiet place to wait for it to calm down. The child's mind never stops too long on something, and soon you will forget him for the first episode. Very important here it is not to give in to the temptation that "anything goes as long as the stop." We must not give in to provocation and we start to scream and use your hands. The slap, physical punishment, humiliation with adjectives or judgments that have nothing to do with the incident, are a violent way to humiliate him both physically and emotionally and do not bring any results over time.It 'important to remember that compliance with the rules is acceptable for a child in an environment of respect for his person. If we ask respect for ourselves and others, we have to take it to him, every day.WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU LEAVE YOUR CHILD MAKE CAPRICCI?If you do not set the rules in a constructive way, the spoiled child will have problems, especially since the school then: will shortly be accepted by their peers, because they are too self-centered and arrogant, it will be poorly tolerated by teachers as too insistent and very docile . Yourselves as parents will have trouble to like him because of his behavior. In the long run a spoiled child become unhappy and even in the school does not achieve the educational objectives because not motivated; Moreover, a growing tendency to refuse from addressing the problems of everyday life.
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